Forever Burdened
This is a down day for Amanda and the poem is written after testing reveals that her cancer is still growing.
Help me to understand, God
I am afraid to ask You why
Why there is so much pain, Lord
So much to make me cry?
My face is stained with tears
And I gasp for breaths of air
I feel trapped and forever burdened
With too much for one to bear
Despite my every effort
To remember You are there
I still buckle under pressure
Still give in to despair
My head tells me “be still”
But my heart screams within
It’s tired of being hurt
And says I’ll never win
Sorrow is too familiar
Hope feels far away
So weighed down by this life
I’m afraid to even pray
I know there is a plan
But I am afraid to live it out
I want to turn away
And give in to my doubt
Help me to believe, God
I am afraid to let You down
I’m ashamed to ever waiver
So silently I drown
Amanda Dieppa
2/25/05
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